In A Shitty Mood? This Will Make You Feel Better

I often talk about how to make yourself feel better. It might be that you need to change your body language, perspective or your external circumstance. 

But sometimes we're just unhappy. And that's okay.

If we were happy all the time, 24/7, suddenly happiness would be boring. We wouldn't look forward to things, we wouldn't embrace life's adventures to change our state.

They say that happiness is the space between your current state and the impulse to change to a different one.

But some state changes are good. Some state changes are okay. Some state changes are simply bad.

For example, changing your state to exercise. That's a positive state change because it provides long-term benefits.

An example of an 'okay' state change is going out for an expensive dinner and drinking wine with friends or family. Yes, you're overindulging in carbs, sugar and alcohol while burning a hole in your pocket (plus tip), but you're also improving your long-term relationships. Obviously if it's every night then it's a negative state change. But in moderation we all know it's okay.

Then there are simply negative state changes. Feeling depressed, so you snort cocaine. Or binge eating because you feel overwhelmed at work.

But, as you can see, wanting to change your state doesn't mean anything bad about you or that you're unhappy - it's just how, when and how often you change it that matters.

So what do you do when you're feeling down, and want to change your state?

What not to do is something impulsive, avoid anything that can cause long-term harm but short-term pleasure. 

What you can do is various techniques, such as:

• list what you're grateful for

• visualise your next life milestone

• do power poses (honestly, they work) and breath deeply

• meditate

And then, sometimes, you can do all of these and you feel the same. Again, that's okay.

Sometimes we just feel a bit down. And in those circumstances, all you need to do is understand.

Think what the underlying reason for your bad mood is. What did you see/read/hear today? Why did it affect your mood?

That's it. A huge part of self-improvement is simply recognising and understanding your thoughts.

Then, when it eventually passes, you'll know more about yourself.

If it doesn't pass for days or even weeks, then maybe you should think about getting help to understand yourself further. 

Remember, unhappiness is a human experience just like any other. Embrace it.