Stop Setting Goals - Do This Instead

We're goal-centred animals. Goals are important for us because human beings need to be aiming towards something. If we're not, there'll always be a sense of longing for meaning.

That's why goals are not only good, but essential. However, most of us have been thinking about them all wrong...

We think of a goal as numerical. 'I want to be earning 10k a month by December', or 'I want to quit smoking completely this time next year'.

And although these are good to understand what we are aiming for, very few stick to plans with goals like this.

That's simply because of the wording we use. If someone says 'I'm trying to quit smoking', then it still assumes they are a smoker. If that's the case, whenever someone offers them a cigarette, their brain will make a subconscious decision and tell them 'you're a smoker who's trying to quit, so it's fairly normal if you still have one now and again'.

Now, if instead the person were to say 'I'm not a smoker' or 'I don't smoke', it will engrain into their brain as fact. Which will mean a completely different reaction when offered a cigarette.

Generic goals assume you are still the current person before achieving your desired goal.

So, how do we counter this?

Next time you create a goal, think about the person you would have to be to achieve it.

You're not someone aiming to earn 10k a month, you're the type of person who earns 10k a month.

You're not trying to eat healthier, you're the type of person who has a healthy lifestyle.

This small mindset shift can transform your life.

Another relevant tool is often referred to as future pacing. It's when you visualise your desired identity so often and in such detail that you start acting like it. That should always be your goal.

Have you ever heard the common phrase 'dress like the job you want, not the job you have'. Well, there's real science behind it.

Become the person you wish to be, and the results will follow.